all talk and no action

A company that sells mobile phones to students has introduced a text service which condenses classic text books into annoying SMS talk. Dot Mobile reckons it can take text messaging, which has been blamed for contributing to poor literacy levels among young people, and re-invent it as "a valuable learning tool for students of English Literature", and so it's teamed up with University College London's Professor John Sutherland to create the "text books".

"The new service has been specifically designed to aid English students in both their choices of books to study and to serve as a valuable revision tool for exams," says the blurb on the site.

So what can subscribers expect? Here's the text version of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet:

FeudTween2hses--Montague&Capulet. RomeoM falls_<3w/_JulietC@mary Secretly Bt R kils J's Coz&isbanishd. J fakes Death. As Part of Plan2b-w/R Bt_leter Bt It Nvr Reachs Him. Evry1confuzd---bothLuvrs kil Emselves.

And since Romeo and Juliet isn't a well known story, here's the translation:

A feud between two houses – Montague and Capulet. Romeo Montague falls in love with Juliet Capulet and they marry secretly but Romeo kills Juliet's cousin and is banished. Juliet fakes her own death. As part of the plan to be with Romeo she writes him a letter but it never reaches him. Everyone is confused and both lovers kill themselves.